44th Inning

[freakinblur]

[Oh boy, regains! Scout always looks forward to getting things in the mail - for him, it's usually cool weapons, a neat hat... but not today, Mayfield. Today Scout pulls out from the mailbox a thin manila envelope. He's disappointed it's not some giant package, but he hastily rips it open to see what's inside. And what's inside can only be described as an extended Mayfield April Fools Joke.

It's full of rather, shall we say, scandalous, compromising photos of a certain enemy Spy and Scout's mom.

There's a long moment of Scout standing on the lawn staring at these, eyes wide and unbelieving, before the inevitable flip-out. Everyone on Mitchell Road can hear the endless stream of Southie-style profanities that suddenly erupt from house 1451.

Once he stops screaming at no one, Scout runs into the garage. After a few moments, he's out on the driveway with a metal trash can, some matches and lighter fluid. It's bonfire time.

Feel free to interrupt him at any point! Be warned, though, his temper is something fierce, and he's not about to share what he has.]

---
[Later, once he's calmed down and all the photos are disposed of, Scout will get on the phone!]

So, it's spring! And there's a whole lotta new people in town again. Well, welcome ta Mayfield, it sucks, enjoy yer stay. Anyway, spring means baseball season and I know a lotta youse guys are already interested in playin'. I wanna get at least enough fer two full teams. That means at least 9 ta be on the field, plus a coupla extras just in case. Let's say 20 people. Anyone can play, I don't care if ya totally suck, 'r don't even got baseball thanks ta whatever the hell kinda crazy world ya come from. If ya wanna learn, whenever I ain't bein' yer friendly police officer, I'll be at tha park. I can teach ya ta play. My name's Scout.

[Anyone interested will indeed find him there when he's not on police duty! Okay, even sometimes when he IS on duty, too. He has a lovely habit of practicing batting by just knocking balls down the street and into the neighborhood, not caring what they hit. Approach?]

Comments

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Wh-- Geez dude, what are ya doin'?! No, I ain't got somethin' against trash cans, numbnuts.

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

Standing here.

Then why are you setting it on fire?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Yer 25 goddamn feet tall, how did ya-- nevermind. I ain't settin' tha can on fire, it's these. [He picks up the envelope, takes out more photos and tosses them in.] An' before ya ask, I ain't tellin' ya what it is.

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

[He stares for a moment. And then shakes his head before trying to peer at the photos.]

... A present, I take it?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

More like an April Fool's gag a few days too damn late.

[If Sideswipe manages to sneak a peek as Scout dumps them into the fire, he'll see some scandalous images of some mane in a red balaclava and a woman with fabulous 1960s hair...]

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

I'd have preferred...

[And he pauses, to study the pictures.]

... pornography... to what we actually got on that day.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

It ain't porn! It's-- [He glares up at Sideswipe, and then just shoves the whole envelope into the fire.]

So. I guess the whole alien robot thing has stuck, huh?

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

It's... ashes. Now.

[He shrugs, and then grins widely.] It would seem that it has. Jealous?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

I dunno. Don't think I could run so fast bein' so big an' made 'a metal.

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

Oh... is that a challenge?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

What, ya think I can't outrun ya just cuz yer 25 feet tall? Ferget it!

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

[He just... stares.]

I'm built with a top speed of over four hundred miles per hour.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Runnin' speed? Or are ya some kinda cheater with, like, rocket boosters or some shit?

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

Please. I'm not an aerial unit. I don't need something so pathetic as that.

It's all my own power.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Well, I'll have ya know I recently outran 3 houses bein' thrown at me AND some missles.

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

I've run across the entire galaxy.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Awright, awright, I get it. Big robot alien, look how impressed I am.

[weaponsparked.livejournal.com]

You should be. I'm perfect again.