14th Inning

[freakinblur]

[Call to the town, filtered to all non-drones. Scout sounds REALLY unhappy, and tired.]


...Guys. Party's postponed. Maybe like tomorrow. 'R Friday. Whatevah. But it will fuckin' happen. Best believe it will.

Agh--! Geez. Can anyone out there set a broken bone? Fuckin' Mayfield.... _{hate this place so goddamn much....} [He starts fading out. The phone is left off the hook.]


---

[MOMENTS EARLIER! Scout returns home from work, and realized he missed the morning's mail since he was too distracted by his hot neighbor in her underwear. He opens it to find an envelope with his name on it, containing a piece of paper with this image on it. He doesn't get it at first, but it doesn't take him long to realize his speed and agility have returned.

He's elated! Soon after Scout can be seen speeding across town in a blur, jumping over everything in his way in spectacular fashion. He's laughing, and mocking anyone who gets in his way. It's all well and good until all of a sudden, it just STOPS with no warning.

In the midst of a double-jump over a set of houses, Scout's legs just give out on him. He falls three stories to the ground and lands with a sickening thud. He's lucky he's not dead, but instead he's got a broken right forearm, a couple of cracked ribs, and probably a concussion amongst the mangled face and copious bruises.]

Comments

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[He tries to keep the grin, had a snarky reply all lined up, but... he can't. He's too pissed off and in too much pain to keep it up. Even in front of a hot chick. This... this is a very bad sign.]

...'S this fuckin' town, pal. Made me think I had my speed 'n' stuff back, then just as I was about ta jump - gone. Just like that. Christ...

[thenorthernwall]

[She leans down and--with UNCHARACTERISTIC GENTLENESS--inspects his injuries.]

How like this place. What did you break? I can set bones, you know.

I need more icons so I can have a confused Scout one. XD

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Well this is weird. Really weird. But this whole day's been kinda fucked up, so really, Plus hey, he's not about to stop any girl from doting over him.]

Uh. This think arm. [Indicated the right one.] My fuckin' battin' arm. Some ribs too. Maybe my head? I don't fuckin' know.

Hahahahaaaa, he needs it for this event. XD

[thenorthernwall]

[She takes his hand cordially, inspecting his arm...]

It's going to hurt if I set it. Do you have any bandages I could use?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Pu-lease, pally, it's just a broken arm! I can handle it.

I dunno. Maybe. Wait, yeah, in tha bathroom, I think. [He bought some after the last time he broke his nose, after all.]

[thenorthernwall]

Cloth bandages, I mean! [As she gives him a bracing and manly pat on the back... And her pupils dilate just a bit.] None of that small stuff! You're going to get superior Armstrong ingenuity and resourcefulness!

NO NOT THE SPARKLES

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Now you're definitely getting a weird look.]

Whoa. What? OK, what kinda crazy has tha town given YOU today?

WAHAHAHAAAA

[thenorthernwall]

Hm? I don't know what you're talking about.

So, are they cloth bandages, or just small ones? If you don't have cloth ones, an unneeded piece of cotton clothing will suffice.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[So. Confused.]

Naw, I got cloth ones. Gauze 'n' tape 'n' shit. [Still giving you a suspicious look.]

[thenorthernwall]

I'll go get them, and we'll get that arm fixed right up!

[She flexes her muscles before going to get the gauze. BE AFRAID.]

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[OK just... what.] Ya know? I think I'm ok. Totally fine. Don't worry 'bout it. I'll call Doc.

[thenorthernwall]

[Sorry Scout! She's already back and she has that arm and you better get ready for the most horrifyingly sparkly bone-setting of your LIFE.]

Be brave! It's going to hurt!

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[THE SPARKLES

GOD, WHY

He struggles vainly for a moment, trying to argue with her, but good lord she is so strong.]

No, seriously, leggo 'a m-- AUGH JESUS GODDAMN FUCK!

[thenorthernwall]

[Surprisingly, it would hurt more if she wasn't Alex-ified. Just chew on that fact. But Scout's arm is properly set, and she's made him a sling, as well! It knocks her back to normalcy--she had to do the very same to her own right arm not that many weeks ago. Fortunately, this has ended a hug attempt! And she looks... mortified.]

...Scout?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[He's just sitting there. Panting, sweating, and gawking.]


Uh. Thanks?

[thenorthernwall]

...Did I just--?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Ohgoddon'tsaysomethingstupidshe'llKILLYOU]

Uh. I, uh. I didn't see nothin'.

[thenorthernwall]

[She sneers.]

I felt strange. Did I do anything strange?

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Flexing. Sparkles. Hug. OK that last part was cool. But those other two were scary enough to outweigh it.]

...nope.

[thenorthernwall]

...Good.

[She seems like she's about to move away, but something in her mind clicks when her uniform shifts and CONGRATULATIONS BLU SCOUT you are the recipient of a warm and welcoming Armstrong hug.

...And if those ribs were broken, possibly punctured lungs. Ogod so sorry.]

Well I didn't think Olivier was going to be the one to kill him.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Phew, ok she - OH DEAR SWEET JESUS, MY INNARDS.

Poor tiny Scout, already broken in so many places today, just sort of makes a whimpery noise in protest. Cracked ribs were already cracked further when Soldier crashed in through the ceiling and landed on top of Scout. At this point, yeah. Punctured lungs.]

_...shit!

I'm laughing so hard. There are TEARS running down my face.

[thenorthernwall]

[A beat, then Olivier RUSHES to the phone! To call a medic! Anyone with proper doctoring skills! Or magic that isn't malfunctioning!]

I think I injured Scout!

this IS pretty epic. XD

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Just laying on the porch.]

_{...fuckin' dyin' here...}

KJSFHJDGKFD

[thenorthernwall]

[She's just staring at him in wide-eyed shock! What the hell???]

No, don't die! It's all my fault!

[BAM, back to normal. And she knows a dying man when she sees one.]

...I'll get a doctor.

[And she goes to do so.]

HTML fail, sorry

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Well he did do a flying fast faceplant from three stories up. It was pretty miraculous that he didn't just snap his neck. Then he had a fistfight with Spy. Then a flying Soldier landed on him. Then he had to run away from a chainsaw-weilding princess. Then there was the Armstrong Hug©.

As she walks by he grabs her pantleg weakly.]

_{H-hey... if ya die here... ya just respawn tha next day fine, right? I don't... no drone doctor... died plenty 'a times, 's fine...}