25th Inning

[freakinblur]

[Somewhere, in a warehouse uptown, Scout stands in front of a small film crew and a director. He's currently dressed as the impressive, glorious image of a young Soviet soldier who is defeating their capitalist and Nazi enemies and leading the loyal workers to victory.]

Okay, so, I stab this Nazi guy, then kick the American guy in tha face, then I say... what the crap, I can't read this. I don't speak Russian! What's it say? .... "Nothing will stop us! We are Russians, we will overcome!"* ...Are you freakin' serious? Awright, whatevah. Let's just get this over with.


[Later, back at home the efficiency apartment, a phone call!]

This is it? Geez. Well if this only lasts as long as Westport, whatevah, this'll be a breeze. They've made me inta some kinda movie star fer their lousy Commie movies, but it beats the factory 'n' all that. I mean, I guess I am a pretty sweet choice ta be the hero, right? 12 hour workdays kinda blow though. What they stick tha rest 'a you chucklenuts with?




<sub>[[totally taken right from an old Soviet propaganda poster, ftw

And just wait till he realizes his speed is gone. OH HO HO.]]</sub>

Comments

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

You like, Russian 'r somethin'? Damn, Mayfield musta been like a picnic for ya compared ta all this. So this is what it's really like over there? Geez.

[bawlingforsoup.livejournal.com]

Latvian. _{[BITTER. RUSSIAN HOW DARE HE THIS IS AN EIGHTY-ONE HONDA--]} I-Is not Russian--Will n-never be Russian. I-I live with M-Mister Russia b-back home... A-And Mayfield w-was l-little dream.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Latvian? Well, not Russian is good. Ya think that fat Russia bastard's got somethin' ta do with this? Cuz I will seriously break his face in right now if he does.

[bawlingforsoup.livejournal.com]

I-I don't k-know. I-I haven't s-seen Mister Russia y-yet.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Well if ya do? Tell 'im Comrade Scout has a boot all picked out ta kick his ass with.

[bawlingforsoup.livejournal.com]

I-I am not t-telling Mister R-Russia that--! I-I already m-make him a-angry enough! A-Am not wanting t-to go t-to Gulags!

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Seriously? Man, what a jackass that guy is. Guess I'll have ta tell him myself.

So we just gotta ride this out, right? No problem. I'm almost kinda curious if they can one-up themselves here after Westport.

[bawlingforsoup.livejournal.com]

D-Do not want t-to get in trouble.

...H-Have seen p-people g-get shot b-back home for n-not doing job. I-Is best to b-be careful. _{G-Gulags much worse am thinking.}

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

I've been shot a zillion times, I ain't scared a that. Prison would be kinda shitty though. Whatever, they're gonna have ta do a hell of a lot more if they think this'll intimidate me.

[bawlingforsoup.livejournal.com]

I-Is much braver t-than me, t-then.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Yeah, well mercenaries don't get anywhere by bein' pussies! Ya gotta stand up for yerself, kid!

[bawlingforsoup.livejournal.com]

Am not mercenary.

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

Well that's obvious. But that don't mean ya should roll over an' let Russia push ya around. Ridin' this out might work... but it might not. We might need ta get to tha bottom of this.

[bawlingforsoup.livejournal.com]

D-Do not want him a-angry. Will j-just behave a-as I h-have in t-the past f-few years.